Small Town Texas

Growing up in a town with fewer than 3,000 people in rural Texas during the 1990s meant living in a close-knit community where everyone knew each other’s stories. Yet, beneath the surface of small town Texas, a quiet tension often simmers. This tension is centered on those who left the town and found success elsewhere. For many who never left, that success sparked feelings of resentment and betrayal.

The Small Town Experience in the 1990s

Life in a small Texas town during the 1990s was shaped by a strong sense of tradition. Jobs were often tied to agriculture or local businesses. Social life revolved around football (shocker), rodeos, dance halls, and teenagers who found their own ways to "have fun". The pace was slow, and change came gradually.

For many young people, the town represented both home and a cage. The familiarity brought comfort but also a sense of confinement. Dreams of what goes on in larger populations, better jobs, and new experiences pulled at the hearts of those who wanted more than what small town Texas had to offer.

Leaving the Town: A Path to Success

In the 1990s, leaving a small Texas town often meant pursuing education or work in larger cities like Dallas, Houston, or Austin. Those who left frequently found opportunities in industries such as technology, oil and gas, business, or medical. Success stories emerged: college degrees, well-paying jobs, and lifestyles that contrasted sharply with the slow rhythms of rural life.

These individuals became symbols of possibility, proof that it was possible to break free from the limitations of small-town life. Yet, their departure also created a divide. Leaving was seen by some as abandoning family, turning their back on the people who raised them.

Why Resentment Took Root

Resentment toward those who left and succeeded grew from several sources:

• Feelings of abandonment: When friends or family left, those who stayed behind often felt left alone to carry on traditions and maintain the town’s social fabric.

  
  

• Jealousy of success: Success outside the town highlighted the limited opportunities available locally, which breeds envy.

  
  

• Fear of change: The departure of young people threatened the town’s sense of intelligence, stirring anxiety about decline and loss of identity.

  
  

• Unspoken expectations: Small towns often expect loyalty and continuity. Leaving was sometimes viewed as a rejection of those values.

  
  

This resentment is rarely expressed openly. Instead, it appears in subtle ways: cold shoulders, whispered judgments, or even the famous "he said, she said" adage which is the root of small town Texas's shameful rumor network. Emotional distances grow faster than physical distance can increase.

Stories from the 1990s: A Case Study

Lets put this into perspective. A person leaves a hometown of 3,000 people in Southeast Texas to attend college and "better" their own life. They obtain a degree in business and later work in various industries obtaining a wealth of knowledge. When they return for visits, some "old friends" treat them differently. It appears they judge them as someone who has “forgotten where they came from.”

The departure and success creates emotional barriers, even when the intentions were positive.

The Impact on Those Who Stayed

For those who remained in small towns, resentment was often mixed with pride and hope. They took pride in their roots and the community they helped sustain. At the same time, they hoped for opportunities that might allow them to succeed without leaving.

The resentment sometimes leads to a resistance to change or skepticism toward educated people. It also creates a cycle where young people feel unwelcome or misunderstood if they chose to return after leaving.

Moving Toward Understanding

Recognizing this hidden resentment is the first step toward healing old wounds. Communities can benefit from:

• Open conversations about the challenges and feelings tied to leaving and staying.

  
  

• Celebrating all forms of success, whether at home or away.

  
  

• Creating opportunities locally to reduce the need to leave for success.

  
  

• Welcoming returnees with understanding and support.

  
  

By addressing these feelings honestly, small towns can build stronger connections that honor both tradition and growth.

Why This Matters

The ongoing struggles in rural communities across the country reflect this situation. Understanding the roots of resentment helps us see the human side of migration and success. It reminds us that leaving a place is never just a physical act—it carries emotional weight for everyone involved.

The next time you hear about someone leaving a small town to chase their dreams, remember the complex feelings that journey can stir. Success is not just about where you go, but how you carry your roots with you—and how those roots respond....